My Story Page 3

Habit

Posting to third eye bloglet - My Story Page 3 - Habit : 7th August, 2006.

The datewise archives of third eye bloglet - My Story : My Date with My Body - about eyes, mind, sex, science and society turned into web pages. My Story Page 3 makes a real interesting reading:

My astonishment knew no bounds.

I am talking about the day, when at age 53 my vision immediately went clear to 20/20 from a blurred 20/140 accidentally, and then fell back to 20/140 again.

And then I could repeat the correction to 20/20 at will whenever I felt like doing so.

But then, why didn't I stay there? I mean, at 20/20.

Because my mind didn't know what my body was doing in order to perform the feat. I wasn't able to comprehend the experience of the action, my body was performing every time it did so.

Okay, but why was my body coming out of that stage that it was always able to go to, at will? Why didn't it stay there for good?

I could have done that but then I wouldn't have known. I was, in fact, intentionally falling back again and again to my old habitual pattern in order to be able to once again enter back into the new state, and try to comprehend as to what my body was actually doing when it was seeing clear.

Falling back was easy because it was habitual.

Entering the new state meant keeping aware and not going into a routine mechanically.

All habit is mechanical routine! Only! The bad habits as well as the good (?) ones!

And I fell back not out of routine but out of my conscious decision to do so. I wanted to learn.

Otherwise it would have been the same thing that once already had happened with me during all these years - the diopter number of my left eye coming down to -2.25D by age 20 from -5.00D in childhood - without my knowing as to how it had happened.

I wouldn't miss the chance this time.

I kept swinging back and forth; sometimes doing this to my body and sometimes that, checking the results every time by comparing them with the experience of my body on the 12th of December; along with the clarity of my vision every time, to my habitual blur of 20/140.

What all did I not do, and which all parts of the body did I not go to, in order to logically learn something out of my new spontaneous experience that I had taken to be a great promise for the mankind!

Today, I can very easily write it all as a retrospect in my third eye bloglet but, believe me, I was in such a total darkness that time as could really have turned me mad.

If only I could be able to tell the world - HOW!

I also started studying ophthalmology.

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